And we question why kids are the way they are...

So, I watched MTV Awards this morning and I have no further questions about why the teenagers of today are the way they are. MTV is geared toward pre-teens/teens/young adults. It consists of talk shows, cartoons, reality tv, and lastly - videos. Lots of sex, scantily dressed women, life made for the tv (which we know isn't REAL), sexually confusing people, and superstars that come from nothing and now have shiny grills.
The best kiss was awarded to Will Ferrel and Sasha Baron Coen. Fine - for me, but what is a 9 year old gonna think?? There was kissing and skin showing all over the MTV awards - it had a real gay overtone. Again - fine with me, I think that stuff is funny, but what about the 9 year old?

So, I guess it all boils down to the parents (as always) who the hell would let their kid watch this stuff? Maybe it's different in the suburbs and rural areas - I doubt it - but most of the parents of my kids are single mothers, they have to work, either the kid is a latchkey kid or watched by someone else. Our students see more than I do, tv/movie wise. And to further that, they get more action than I do. (and remember I teach 6-8th grade...) It's sickening. There's no one to blame or too many to blame and that's what I'm really looking for today...so I blame MTV and BET for that matter.

Buying a house is a full time job.

If I had a job, I would not be able to go through all this crap and meet people, call people, etc. This is really turning out to be a lot more stressful than I thought it would be. I've now consulted 3 Realtors and have talked to 3 mortgage people. I've gotten rid of one of the mortgage people and one of the Realtors. My whole basis was that they didn't feel right. I'm sure at some point it will all become clear that these are the people I'm supposed to work with and this is how buying a house is really supposed to be. If anyone has an opinion, I'd like to know whether going with a big bank or going with a mortgage title loan company is better? Which to choose? Which is better and why?

At this point, I think I've got to go with the better loan - no matter if it comes from the big bank or the little guy.

And furthermore, what sucks is that while I'm dickering around with these people there is the cutest house that I love on Sleepy Hollow just waiting for me to buy it.

ARGH.

mow or cut

Do you mow the lawn or cut the grass? I definitely mow the lawn. Of which, I did this morning. I can't tell you how fantastic it is to have all this time on my hands. I've really been using it well and getting stuff done. Love it! I'm going to have a garage sale soon. I have to. I've been going through every room and every box and deliberating - do I need this....? So I have piles of stuff, just ready for a garage sale.
Cheers to summer vaca! The best part of being a teacher: June and July (august doesn't count since we start on the 9th...)

Riddle me this

So, I have this old friend from high school and post undergrad. We were very close and still to this day have that sort of instant 'click'. He's an amazing man, I didn't realize this till after we went our separate ways. Recently, he contacted me to talk about a personal situation. I was honored and excited. Excited for the opportunity to be friends again. Excited to get to know each other again. Excited to have another person to explore and adventure with. We talked a few times, went to lunch and then...he really hasn't contacted me again. He's sent me a few emails in reply to emails I sent him.

Analysis of lunch:
The lunch was good. I was nervous and reflective. He was forthright and open. There were lulls in our conversation - I didn't think they were awkward (remember I was feeling reflective). We smiled and laughed. I would have rather had his lunch, than mine (normalities). He hugged me at the end.

Anyway - I can't figure out why it was important that we talk and then he dropped it. Which sucks because, I want to be there for him, and I was really excited about our renewed friendship - that now, looks doomed to be lost.

Sometimes, this is all I think about. Is it obvious I have a lot of time on my hands right now?

fine

I absolutely hate it when someone asks you how you are doing and doesn't really care. As people we're just supposed to answer fine and move on. Like our life is a formality. I really feel like if someone isn't expecting an honest answer, than don't ask.
Fine is such a trite word. If you don't care how someone really is or are just doing it for formalities, than don't ask. If you don't want people to know how you are doing, then express that.

"Hey, how are you doing?" asks the old friend with the long hair. "I don't really want to talk about it," replies the unrequited love.

Doesn't that sound much better than, "fine."

Anyhow, that's just my opinion and this is just my blog.

One is the lonliest number

alone
Function: adjective
Etymology: Middle English, from al all + one one
1 : separated from others : ISOLATED
2 : exclusive of anyone or anything else : ONLY
3 a : considered without reference to any other b : INCOMPARABLE, UNIQUE

As I delve into this house buying expedition, I feel more and more alone. As in the 1st definition. I feel more and more like it doesn't feel right, or I don't want to do it-alone. I have no qualms about the fact that I can do it. I can afford it. I can swing it. But, I don't want to. I don't want to buy a house on my own. I don't want to go through this entire process by myself. Am I being a baby? Maybe. Am I being selfish? Of course, we're talking about me being alone here...

The funny thing about the word alone is that it comes from two words; all and one. All has the connotation of many, lots and One is simply that, 1.

Anyway - I'm not trying to throw a pity party (my parties are usually much bigger) I just wanted to get out some frustrations I'm having at this moment.

As she stomped around her rented house, sweating, arms folded, she huffed "I don't want to buy a house. I just don't."

#1

#1 can mean so many things.

There's Nelly's song - #1, which has at many times in my life been my mantra.
Often people ask what I'm going to do without working all summer and my answer is "I'm gonna take care of #1."

And then on the other hand - there's so many #1's in our lives. There's the #1 song when we were born (mine was "Rich Girl" by Daryl Hall & John Oates). There's the #1 coffee (McDonalds-no really...). There's many different companies that think and advertise they are #1.

A #1 at Taco Bell is different from the #1 at McDonalds and Burger King.

There's the Top Ten on David Letterman....#1 is supposed to be the funniest.

When you win, you want to be #1, you want to win the gold medal, you want to be first.

#1 is on my mind a lot today. I'm trying to make it my job, my business if you will.
It's a lot harder than I thought. I am very used to catering to others and putting myself later. Not so easy to just rotate those rolls and put myself first and take care of myself first. It's my goal for the summer, so I guess I have all summer to work on it. Cheers to the #1.

tagit

Tag you're it!!!
The rules are: Once you have been tagged, you write a blog with ten, weird, random things, facts, or habits about yourself. At the end you choose 10 people to be tagged, list their names and why you chose them. Don't forget to leave a comment that says "you are tagged" and tell them to read your latest blog. Enjoy!!!!

1: I like to sleep on the couch.

2: I collect pub mats - you know coastersl that you put your beer on. I like to write on them to commemorate my time where ever I picked it up. I usually add everyones names, the date, and the place - and if it was a special event.

3: I am in the process of buying a house - it makes me kinda wiggidywack every morning, but I calm down after a while.

4: I took Maggie, my dog, to the vet today so they could remove the tick because I didn't want to.

5: I took piano lessons for ten years...but can't play much if you sit me down in front of the piano.

6: I still play the oboe. I'm in a community band now and the other oboe player is 81 years old! It's something I think I'll play forever.

7: I would like to teach the world not be be a victim. The victim mentality is what keeps poverty so popular in the US. It also puts up hurdles and obstacles that sometimes people don't feel like they can get over.

8: I think about my Grandpa and Grandma Barnes, a lot.

9: I still have dreams and aspirations.

10: These are kinda boring and dumb, but hopefully you learned a little more. If you read my blog from time to time - you know a lot more.

I tag: don't matter - do you.


You read it, you reply by making your own blog..

no vacancy

"Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened." Dr. Seuss

I was cleaning out my yahoo mail and found this quote.

I thought it was a good one and so I wanted to share. It really supports
my belief in having no regrets. I've really been doubting myself lately, thinking
'if I had just, or what if I had, or I should have...' Those kind of thoughts
really tear me up. As a person I have to stand for what I've decided and believe
in it. I don't always make smart decisions, actually I don't most of the time. But
I do make peace with my decisions because God knows, there is no room in my life for
two things:

1. regret and 2. grudges.

I don't know how to be free of either, but maybe putting up a no vacancy sign when those times come around would help...

Memorial Day

I have a new Memorial Day tradition and it is to go to the Celebration at the Station. The KC Symphony plays a 90 min. concert at the Union Station and then they play to fireworks. AMAZING!
It was such a good time and we had a good place to sit. I want to just meet up with everyone next year at the same place and then for years to come.
For those of you who think there is nothing to do in KC - think again. This city offers much more than anyone knows. There is so much to explore and so many festivals/arts stuff to go to. And really a lot of it doesn't have to cost a ton of money. I definitely spend more money at the bar on any given night, than I do going to a festival, paying to get in and then paying for whatever inside and having a better time! There is nothing better than being out amongst lots of people and having entertainment. I get tired of being the entertainment at the bar.....it's a nice change of pace when there's quality entertainment and people watching.

So for memorial day, I'm going to commemorate my freedom. My freedom to go and have a good time with friends and do something different and celebrate the awesome city that I live in.

I'm Back!

So sorry that I've been gone sooo long. Let me give you an outline of what's happening before I really get into it (any good teacher would...)

March
-Natalie's passion party (hosted by Mary and I)
-My 30th birthday
-Natalie's shower

April
-trying on bridesmaids dresses, getting all that sorted out
-Mary's 30th birthday
-Natalie's bachelorette party

May
-dumped phone in toilet, lost everything
-Natalie's wedding
-Mother's day
-Shannon's 30th birthday
-8th grade graduation
-buttloads of paperwork
-last day of school (25)
-Memorial day weekend events (Royals game, BBQ festival, Union Station)

I just did that by memory...so I know I missed some things....but you get the point, I've been a very very busy girl.

So today was the last day of school for this year. I cannot be happier. I'm so glad this year is over - it was just soo weird. I'm very much looking forward to my summer. I'm going to look into buying a house, get a part time job, work out, eat healthy, and enjoy myself. I'm not going to do anything I don't want to do. I might not even do anything for anyone but myself. Because that is how I feel it needs to be - all about #1.

Anyway - now that I have my password and username for this deal, I'll write a lot more...maybe even daily. I do have lots of interesting things to write and talk about. Lots of stories and good times to tell.

I'll leave you with this for tonight..."more cowbell"

My birthday is coming soon...

Here's an invite:

I will be celebrating the big 3-0 at The Red Balloon 10325 W. 75th St. Overland Park, KS on March 24th.
We'll meet there around 9ish dressed in the best 70's clothes you can find!!
Sure to be a good time!

Here's the #1 songs during the year 1977 (when I was born):

 1  ABBA  Dancing Queen
1  Alan O'Day  Undercover Angel
1  Andy Gibb  I Just Want to Be Your Everything
1  Barbra Streisand  Love Theme from "A Star Is Born" (Evergreen)
1  Barry Manilow  Looks Like We Made It
1  Bee Gees  How Deep Is Your Love
1  Bill Conti & His Orchestra  Gonna Fly Now (Theme from "Rocky")
1  Daryl Hall & John Oates  Rich Girl
1  David Soul  Don't Give Up On Us
1  Debby Boone  You Light Up My Life
1  Eagles  Hotel California
1  Eagles  New Kid In Town
1  Fleetwood Mac  Dreams
1  Glen Campbell  Southern Nights
1  KC & The Sunshine Band  I'm Your Boogie Man
1  Leo Sayer  When I Need You
1  Marvin Gaye  Got to Give It Up (Part 1)
1  Meco  Star Wars Theme / Cantina Band
1  Shaun Cassidy  Da Doo Ron Ron
1  Stevie Wonder  Sir Duke
1  The Emotions  Best of My Love
1  Thelma Houston  Don't Leave Me This Way 

funny little ditty

I wanted to share an email I wrote today - thought it witty and clever

Here's the run down of my day (really)...
get to work early
set up classroom
go through first class
para leaves  - have to go check on Randy during classes for rest of 1/2
day
go get V8 from work room
someone runs into me getting V8 all over my cream sweater/left boob
have to go into the principals meeting to ask for Tide pen
sit in 6th grade principals office rubbing tide pen on my boob (where
the stain was)
go up to my classroom
go check on randy
go to bathroom to do the tide pen again
break the tide pen
sit in my class
watch Oprah's Africa school special
take kids to lunch
go to lunch in work room
walk with Mr. Jackson to office
Mr. Jackson lets me know that there is something brown on my boob
I tell him thanks for looking
I go to the work room for a short meeting
decide to go home and change
fall in front of guest and gym teacher (flat on my face, my ankle gave
out)
get up
brush off
leave and go home
change
put Maggie outside
go to Walgreen's
buy more Tide pen's
go back to work
stop and ask Aimee if I missed anything
go up to my room
sit down and write this stupid email.

Today is a sad day...

My favorite bar, Kennedy's, burned down today. I spent at least one day a week at this fine establishment. As many of you know, this bar is right up the street from from my house, along with 75th Street Brewery. For those that care, 75th Street Brewery, which I also frequent, only has water and smoke damage. From what I hear, it will be fine. Everything else-burnt to the ground with only the outside standing. Pray for the 5 firemen that were hurt in the fire, some are in critical condition. And please think happy thoughts about Kennedy's and pray that they rebuild....I will miss it severely.

Sunday nights

I love Sundays. I usually hang out at my house, clean, cook, be domestic. But tonight...I am totally dreading work tomorrow and have lots of anxiety about it. My job this year has been pretty sucky - I'm not doing what they hired me for. I don't feel very utilized, or successful. I don't feel fulfilled or satisfied. I'd really like to be doing something else next year...still teaching or in the field...but something where I feel successful and fulfilled. What to do? The next month and a half are going to totally suck. We are having to do so much extra work and the tensions and attitudes are soo negative. By the time the big 'test' comes around....everyone will be burnt out and finished.
Well...that's all, just needed to express my anxiety for what is happening and what is to come.

The bitter cold

If you've been reading my posts since August, you know that I live in an old house. There's a lot of problems. My most recent is the bitter cold that is climbing in from the outdoors. Heating up the house = $$. So, here's my most recent solution: Bonnie's Dance Party. This occurs many times and for hours at my house. It's open pretty much anytime I'm awake. When I'm asleep I do the Electric Blanket Snuggle.

Okay - I'm reaching for the jokes - you get the picture. It's friggin cold and I'm gonna be a good dancer.
Stay warm...

Yes folks, it's winter

And so, I find myself using this site as a rant rather than here's what's happening to me. Here's my latest rant.

It snowed today, most schools got out a little early. I, the lucky one, have to be at work by 7am, so that means I'm outta there on a regular day at 3. Today, we got out around 2:15. It had snowed for several hours by then and was bitterly cold. But it's winter in the Midwest. We've had snow/ice/sleet already this year, this time is no different. It seems though that Midwesterners have several deficits in their short term memory. Everyone forgets how to drive in the snow. I live maybe like 7-10 minutes away from my job. It took me a whole 30 minutes or more to get home today - and the roads had already been sanded and scooped. CRAZY!! I understand wanting to be safe, but really.... Previous to my experience, we had been looking at the weather on the internet and there had been several car pile-ups on the highways already. There was a 35 car pile up north. There was a 7 car pile up out west. Seriously - do we really not know how to drive or do we forget that this weather is the weather we're supposed to have, not the a45-50 degree weather we had the other day. Maybe when it gets above 40 our brains automatically dispose of the winter weather advisory. Maybe we go into gearing up for spring and start thinking about newness and buds on the trees and flowers and that fills our brain, rather than, hmm...oh...say....the fact that it's winter and we had 6 inches of snow just 8 days ago.

Anyhow - that's my "people don't know how to drive" rant.

and so on and so on and so on

Someone sent me this questionnaire on myspace. It has intriguing questions so I thought I'd blog it instead, for those that actually read this, you can know a little more about me.


1. Ever punch someone in the face? no, but on a daily basis I say "I"m going to kick you in the face and make you bleed" don't ask me why...

2. How old are you? 29

3. Are you single or taken? single

4. Eat with your hands or utensils? both

5. Do you dream at night? yes, usually in color

6. Ever seen a corpse? on tv, at a funeral, that's it

7. Have you ever wished someone dead? no - you'd have to really hate someone for that.

8. Do You Like Bush, the president? not really, seems kinda unintelligent, stubborn


HERE COMES THE EQUALLY INTERESTING PART...

9. Whats your philosophy on life and death? die to live, don't live to die

10. If you could do anything , and have no one know, what would it be? ohhh...ummmm...if I did it, I would tell people because that's how I do it - woman of very few secrets.

11. Do you trust the police? yes

12. Do you like country music? yes

13. What is your fondest memory? I have so many - probably be creating static electricity with my brother in the backseat of the car, making my dad mad...but it was great, we made lightening with our fingers...

14. If you could change anything about yourself what would it be? what do you think...I would wear a size 12 until I died

15. Who do you want to date? Jack Black, of course

16. What do you wear to sleep? depends on the temperature, but normally I wear pajamas

17. Have you ever peed in a pool? yes...you have too

18. Would you hide evidence if you committed a crime? No, I'd turn myself in

19. If you only had one day to live, what would you do? Whatever I wanted

20. What is your favorite thing? my electric blanket

21. Do you think your attractive? yes, I"m damn sexy

22. What's your favorite color? probably yellow, but I like a lot of colors

23. If you could bring back anyone that has passed, who would it be? My grandpa Barnes

24. Tell me one interesting/odd fact about you? I play the oboe

stressed

There are so many things that have been going on in my mind that I could blog about. BUT, for some reason, I just can't ever seem to bring myself to actually sit here and write about them. There's some ironically funny stories to tell, but yet again, why...I'm not into entertaining right now.
I'm struggling. Struggling with life. I'm sure there are several reasons as to my struggle, but I believe it probably all boils down to the fact that I'll be 30 soon, and the life I wanted to be living..I'm not. While I am academically and career-wise successful...there's not much else I've been successful at. I know, I know - that's a lot, and a lot more than some people have...I acknowledge that and most of the time it gives me some solace. But right now..I don't think there's much solace out there for me. I'm pretty stressed out about my current situation. Not really at all happy about it. Am I changing it? Sometimes.

I really do see a light at the end of the tunnel, and I am usually optimistic. I don't believe pessimism really gets you anywhere, but down. So...I'm not trying to throw myself a pity party, although I love to party..but I'm just trying to write down some real feelings about how I am today. Maybe tomorrow will be different, or later tonight, and I'll feel like bringing some entertainment to your day - because I got some good ones stored up.

iphone rant

So, Mac, has come out with an i-phone. It's amazing, because it has an 'i' in front of it. Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to hate on MAC....but c'mon. You have to see that there are a million phones out there already that do the same stuff!! Just because it's MAC doesn't mean that it's soo much better. In fact, it looks very similar to a phone sprint came out with a while ago that had a PDA built in. Plus it's huge, like the size of your hand from middle finger tip to the bottom of your palm. Does anyone have a phone that big anymore??? Didn't think so.

I would be impressed if the iphone could do something that the rest of the phones didn't do, you know, like not drop calls, never lose service, clean the house, wash the dishes, replace trashcan liners.....you know - it would be amazing then. But alas, it doesn't. And it will drop calls, and it will have areas where there is no service and it will clog up the internet and so all the Wi-Fi places will run slow. (I don't really know about that, just wanted to throw it in...)

Anyway, my thoughts are...just think about it before you get all goo-goo eyed and buy a $500 phone for the name. You can get something similar damn near free elsewhere.

The post everyone's been waiting for....

As Oprah says, "Live your best life."

Here are my goals for 2007:

-continue working out (make it my new bar)
-change my eating habits (and drinking)
-save money, not off to a good start on this...but will happen in 2007
-continue to organize my life stuff
-keep my car clean (haven't cleaned it out from 2006...)
-go to church, get involved in something the church does

How will I be striving to live my best life:
-be healthy, mentally, physically, and socially
-challenge myself daily
-be happy with my single life, really live it up
-give myself some rewards for the good changes I make


Okay - there it is, my little key to continued success in my happy life.

New Years and other such idiodicies

Well, at the last moment I went out of town this weekend for new years. I spent it with good friends and really fun times. It was exactly what I wanted, even though I didn't know it.

On Jan. 1st I got home about 5ish and prepared to go and spend the night in Loose Park. We had to be ready to book a friends wedding date for the rose garden on Jan. 3rd. We heard that people would start lining up around 4:30AM...so as the maid of honor, of course I felt obligated to agree to do such a crazy thing. Well the groom went to case the park around 8pm. There were already people there!! So we hurriedly got ready and went up to spend the night in Loose Park. We had coffee, clothes, snacks, blankets, chairs, hats, gloves, socks, and more coffee. So we get up there and soon after more people come, and then more...and all of a sudden we're having a slumber party of 7-8 dates...dates for their wedding that is. No one knew each others names, just the dates of the wedding. My friend and I were referred to as May 12. We really didn't have a realistic idea of what we were doing or how cold it got. On two different occasions we took turns going out to the car and warming up. It was really weird to have frost on my jacket, sleeping bag, and anything else that was laying around. I saw a falling star in the early morning which was very exciting. I met lots of other crazy people and I got to do something really great for my friend. But...I don't think I will ever sleep outside during the middle of winter again.
So, for all those whom I haven't called back or wished a happy new year - many apologies.

Tomorrow I start back to school. UGH!!!! But I"m happy for the routine. I'll let you know how it goes, for now - this girls gotta go to bed!

A MOUSE IN THE HOUSE?!?!?!

So yes, over Christmas it became very clear, clear as a small brown mouse, that I have mice in my house. I'm not dirty so don't go being judgmental....but I live in a freekin old house that hasn't been taken too good care of. All of you know this that have been reading my blogs, so this shouldn't be any surprise. My parents bought me traps (I was going to, but haven't been to the store) and so I put one out today. I put out a mouse trap, knowing full well that it would trap a mouse. I've thought this through several times. So, about 12:30 (half an hour ago) I'm sitting her and pop - I hear a mouse trap. I didn't know what to do. I sat here, told Maggie (my dog) to go look, she's pitiful and didn't, so I went and stuck my head in the kitchen and on the floor is a trap turned over. At first I thought maybe the mouse got away, but then I noticed the tail sticking out. I'm going to go back and make sure it's still there....okay, I think it's still there. Now, when I envisioned myself taking care of this situation...I saw myself picking up the mouse/trap and all with a gloved hand and many plastic bags and just throwing it all away. But the moment it snapped, I knew....there is no way in freaking hell I can pick up the dead mouse (hopefully dead) and the trap. I shouldn't have to do it....there should be someone here to help me...I shouldn't have to deal with this stuff alone. So now, I'm mad again that I have to do this stuff alone. Dammit...I just don't think it should be this way, and I don't understand why it is.

I've got a lot to write about

So it's been a while and I've got about 6, maybe 7 blogs saved up to write. I'll attempt as many as I can tonight.

Texas - I visited Texas on the Weekend of the 8-11. It was a really good friend from Northwests birthday, so I took a little trip out to visit her and her wifey, I'll call them B & D from here on out. (I try to protect peoples identity since I don't normally write and ask them if it's okay before blogging) Anyhow...I actually flew into College Station, Texas. It was the smallest airplane I have ever flown on!! Very different experience...I'd like to stick to the big ones...I just don't think small ones are for me....
But I got there and we celebrated 30 years of B's life all weekend. It was absolutely a good time! I learned something while I was in Texas...I learned that it is good for your health to have a big belly laugh at least once a day. And so, let's all have one -pause for belly laugh- okay, that was good...we'll do it again tomorrow. It was a good time and I'm so glad I got to spend B's 30th with her.

Christmas - I had a fab Christmas. Got to see lots of people, had lots of people stay over including my cousin and her husband. It was good to see them. I got to spend some good time with my brother. I love it when we can hang out. He gave me this absolutely fantastic computer - which will probably be recurring on the blogs because I am in love with it.
Christmas was great....I was surrounded by family!

New Years - I have a whole list of stuff to write...but I'm putting that in another blog. Right now, I'm going to give you my list of options for New Years so that someone can make a decision because I haven't....

In no particular order
Robert and Samara's house in Cameron (will be a fun party, no doubt)
Alan and Jacque's house in Maysville (brian will be there....)
Natalie's house (guaranteed a good time!!)
Record Bar (love going out, but probably is way to costly for me)
Shannon & Andrew's (they'll just be getting back to Clarinda so I've crossed it off)
stay home by myself and cry
Waldo has a ball drop, I could always enjoy that

I am leaning on Natalie's house, but kinda swaying toward Robert and Samaras or Alan and Jacque's.......ugh...

A picture is worth a thousand words

OR a trip to the gym everyday this week and vegetables for dinner. I am still not understanding why I feel one way and see that in the mirror, and then look at a picture and see another person standing there. Someone I don't know. Someone that looks like they weigh 300 pounds... I don't feel like that. I don't even feel overweight most of the time, although I am.
Anyway, I printed the picture and hopefully, it'll take me to the gym more and make me eat healthier, so next time I take a picture - I'll really look like I feel.

Finally, there are presents under my tree...

It just doesn't much feel like Christmas is less than a week away. I'm floored by how fast the first part of the school year has gone. Whoosh, there goes the time! I didn't even blink.

The nice thing is that I have 4 1/2 days left of work, and then I'm going to take a long break. Well, it's like a week and a 1/2, but I'm going to try and make it feel long. I will be working some during the break, I'm building a proposal for a Behavior Disorder Program for our district. I have to give that on the 3rd of Jan. I'm looking to put that into place for next year and then maybe move over to the Alternative School, I'm not sure about it...but I know that I need more chaos to entertain me. I miss the chaos and the behaviors. I really would like to work with much needier kiddos. Plus, my supervisor is very snippy with me most of the time now, and if I can choose not to work with that, I'd really rather not.

Other than work, there's not much going on. I'm struggling with life and what I want to make of it. It's such a blessing to have this beautifully blank canvas in front of you....and any color you want...but I'm really struggling with what I want the complete picture to look like. I know, I know, I should just start drawing....and I'm getting there...

Merry Christmas to everyone! I'll try to write more when I'm not working this holiday.

The first snow day

It's the first snow day of the year! Yay! I haven't really marked it with any tradition yet. I wanted to bake cookies, but I haven't started that process yet...everything is going really slow today. We're actually supposed to get snow today (we had ice yesterday) but now they are saying we are not getting as much snow as they say we are going to...so oh well. I was hoping for another day off.

I never thought I would be the owner of a dog that needed a sweater. Well guess what? This wussy, Maggie, needs a sweater. I can't afford to keep my house nice and toasty, so she just sits there and shakes. I know she's just faking it, but good lord. SO I'm going to go buy her a sweater and see how that works...maybe she'll be warmer then. Anything for the dog.

So I spent last night putting plastic up on my windows. I actually all but two done. I'm not really sure that it helped a whole lot, there is still a draft. But I think it helped a little. I probably should put heavy material up over them as well to help keep the draft up, but a girl can only afford so much. I still have a few things to do to help keep my house a little warmer and we'll see if those work at all. I can't believe I live in such a place....but here I am, with the draft, the spidercrickets, mice and who knows what else.

For those of you that read and know MJ, today is her bday - so happy birthday to her!

Thanksgiving!!

Hooray for Thanksgiving and the 3 days I get offa work! I'm so excited to have the time to collect myself, veg, do whatever I want, and not worry about getting up in the morning.

So tonight I am getting prepared for the dinner. I have to go and buy some things still, so I'll do that. Then I might make a dessert or two.

Happy Thanksgiving to everyone! I hope yours is as family filled and enjoyable as mine will be. Much love!

It's just me...

This posting is dedicated to living alone. Cheers to you (don't know if any are out there) that live alone, all by yourself.....that means no other human being is in the house right now....or at least one that claims residency 3 out of 7 days of the week.

So lately, I've been a real baby about having to do things myself. I found a mouse in my house, myself. I had to take care of my dead hamster, myself. I have to wash the dishes, myself. I have to clean the house and do the laundry, myself. I have to deal with the spidercrickets, myself.
I'm just tired of it. I at least wish I had someone else to blame the unwashed dishes on...but no, only myself. My clothes are put up, it's my fault. Need to vacuum...just me.
Actually the latter doesn't bother me as much as having to deal with the mouse and bugs and dead hamster by myself do. I guess it makes me stronger...but what woman wants to actually be that strong. I can do everything on my own, even when I think I can't. What man is gonna want a woman like that?


Tried to give you some time to ponder, but not too much. I still think that sometime at some point ( I might be 80 and in the home) I will find someone to bury my hamsters and fight the spidercrickets with me. But Jesus, I hope he comes sooner than later (and preferably not when I"m 80, even though I said that)...amen.

Papa Murphy's

I used to eat papa murphy's with my room mates every sunday or so. For some reason I left that tradition back in the northland. But I think it would be a good one to bring back. I got this flyer in the mail and it looks goood!

I love Saturday mornings! I'm getting ready to clean the house, do some laundry, maybe mow the leaves (which I still haven't done). It's supposed to be beautiful here today until after thanksgiving! Like in the 70's! Rock! Although, surprise me with two days of snowdays (monday and tuesday) and I'll be elated.

I have a friend on youtube now. You can watch him do his magic. I think it's rather funny and entertaining -that's why I'm sharing it. If you want to know who it is (because you might not know) email me.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lVC-MTHzRjM#GU5U2spHI_4

Well, I"m onto do things. Getting rid of the hamsters/gerbil will be one of the things I do - Everyone say 'goodbye rodents!'

Oh, go see STRANGER THAN FICTION! It's a fantastic, life changing movie. LOVE IT

You might be offended if....

you read this blog.

Two things...

1. Why would anyone believe that abortion is the reason for the increase in immigrants that live in America??? Did they forget the 'American Dream' and how everyone wants to live it. The land of the free and brave, and easy work which means money. If any of you have ever been to Mexico, you understand why these people are over here, and it's not because abortion is legal. That deserves a, "damn Republicans..."

2. I'm maturing. One might not notice it with my recent decisions, but I really am. AND I'm more and more drawn to nights in than nights out, which to me, is a sign of moving on to the next stage of life. Don't get me wrong...I kinda dislike a lot of things in my life now: being single, choices I make, no motivation...etc...etc..BUT I'm getting there...slow, but I'm moving in the next direction...which is very important. And if you don't understand a word of this jiberish...well...I don't either..so I can't help ya.

Here's a toast to the damn republicans for giving me something to write about. clinky, clinky

A fanciful feast

I have a full fanciful feast of boredom. It's a buffet full of gorgeous entrees, all made out of boredom.

I've really got to learn how to entertain myself better. A hobby perhaps....

Good news: I might have another after-school program gig. Good, easy money. I'll probably hear more about it in the next few weeks. Sounds like another M-Th thing. I'll be making more money and more time will be taken up. And maybe, just maybe, it'll be a little crazy and I'll have a story every now and then.

I'm looking forward to Thanksgiving break, mostly for the break...but I also will see my brother for a minute. I'm looking forward to the family getting together and me forcing them to play board games or card games.

RAchael Ray is going to be on Iron Chef Sunday at 8pm (i think). It'll be a good show. I love Rach, and since she makes a ton of 30 minutes meals, this competition should be a cinch.

Yup, bored.

ahhh...a monday off

So, I took today off. I just felt yesterday like my life was spinning out of control and I needed to catch it. So I did. I accomplished many things today that have made me feel better and will make the rest of the week/month simplier. I think that taking a day off once a month is going to be necessary for me this year. I just dislike what I'm doing so much, that I need 4 day weeks...all the time.

On Wednesday, I go talk to an administrator about how things are going in my classroom, he came and observed it the other day. So...my conversation will probably reveal how I"m feeling this year and what I plan on doing about it, and then he'll go and tell everyone else....so we'll see if anything changes. I'd really like them to change it by semester so that when I come back from winter vacation, I'll feel like I can do the rest of the year.

The hardest is keeping a good attitude. But my coworkers deserve that...they work incredibly hard as well and we all deserve to have good days everyday.

Anyway...I think I've decided to mature, although I'm still very worried about not meeting anyone. I'm just as worried about the holidays with everyone else having a significant other. I'm trying not to let it bother me, but it does....so I just deal.

HOpe everyone had a fabulous monday...mine was very productive.

Saturday Mornings

I love Saturday Mornings. I am so productive. I get a lot of things completed, and feel good about what I do. (wish everyday were saturday morning)

I'm in a quandry about whether to mature, or not mature. I want to, really. But at the same time, I don't want to become a spinster or single forever person. So, I'm in a quandry. I don't know that one can mature and still party, or one can mature and still go out and spend 50 bucks in a night. I don't know that one single person can mature and find another mature single person....
One might ask what my definition of mature would be....and I think it's really about the decisions you make. DO you throw caution to wind, or do you make calculated decisions? IF you throw caution to the wind, you might have a really fun adventure and have a great story to tell one day. IF you make calculated decisions, you know and understand the affect of your decision on everyone, including yourself. Mature or not mature...that is today's question.

Saturday Mornings

I love Saturday Mornings. I am so productive. I get a lot of things completed, and feel good about what I do. (wish everyday were saturday morning)

I'm in a quandry about whether to mature, or not mature. I want to, really. But at the same time, I don't want to become a spinster or single forever person. So, I'm in a quandry. I don't know that one can mature and still party, or one can mature and still go out and spend 50 bucks in a night. I don't know that one single person can mature and find another mature single person....
One might ask what my definition of mature would be....and I think it's really about the decisions you make. DO you throw caution to wind, or do you make calculated decisions? IF you throw caution to the wind, you might have a really fun adventure and have a great story to tell one day. IF you make calculated decisions, you know and understand the affect of your decision on everyone, including yourself. Mature or not mature...that is today's question.

being bored

Thank you to that one person that actually reads this....it pushes me to write in it and entertain you so you are not as bored as me.

I'm bored. Kinda bored with life. Ready for something new to come my way.

Anyway, not much new. I finally got closure with a tough situation that I had been dealing with for some 3 odd years. It's a wonderful feeling, yet a weird one. Might actually add to my bored-ness.

I finished my upstairs bedroom, so I am now equipped with a guestroom for anyone that would like to come and stay. I feel that I am an excellent hostess, and can provide you with a good time.
Would love to see anyone and everyone.

I'm going to try to write on here more often...share some of my worldly views. So check in!

Dating is....

There are so many different sections to dating. Usually you start with the honeymoon where you get to know each other and talk all night etc. Then there's the awkward time, where you like each other but not sure that it's the one, can't always get along, can't figure out how to communicate.....ugh...it's the worse and you go through all that just to get to the part where you are comfortable. Why can't we just skip the awkward part...that little middle part, just skip right over it. Go from honeymoon to comfortable.....that would be fantastic.

Dating is like a three course meal that has a fantastic salad and dessert, but a crappy main dish.

Thanks, Mr. President...

Well, I got on here to update my blog more recently than I did last time...and while I have a thousand witty things to say, none seem to be worth writing. I've had some great conversations lately about No Child Left Behind (NCLB) and Bush's drive to have all students reading on level by next year or something. In fact, in it's purest form NCLB is fantastic for special education...but all the crap that has come with it like standardized testing and Annual Yearly Progress (AYP), Grade Level Expectations (GLE), and State standards make it such a nightmare for the teacher and the student.

I predict that in 12 years the students that will graduate from high school will be well equipped to take tests....anything else, I'm not so sure! They sure will be able to take a piece of text and get the answers to questions that come after it (does this actually happen in real life?? When was the last time you read a passage and answered questions about it, on the other hand, when was the last time you read something because you wanted too? These kids can't do that). They sure will be able to eliminate at least two out of four choices. They will be able to use words like analyze, predict, assess, estimate, summarize, trace, infer, evaluate, formulate, describe, support, explain, compare, contrast, predict---god, I could go on forever. And while most of those kids will have higher level thinking skills......they won't be able to relate to real life....you know, the one you get thrown into after college.

And I have to ask, what about the kids in the 'hood'? While they are having to predict and infer, they'll also be collecting guns..selling drugs..who knows. What I do know is that they have to know how to protect themselves, and describing what a poem is about using at least two examples from the text....really isn't going to help them make it through. And while I totally believe in educating and intellegence--these kids are kids to begin with and someone has to teach them how to play, and teach them to get along with others, and teach them how to be kids, teach them to imagine--because that's part of growing up too. I can't summarize until I know how to read and comprehend. I can't read and comprehend until I know the sounds. I can't know the sounds until I know the alphabet.

What you didn't know is that we are teaching our kindergartners (who go to school full days now) these words (the higher level ones listed above)....we're already starting them in kindergarten... were giving kindergartners the ability to test. They've barely lived 5 years....and we are already building them for NCLB success. Beautiful.

By the way, we're doing district wide tests this week. I'm ready for this week to be over...Friday afternoon will be very very welcome.

I feel the need

to update my blog.

Well, it's been like forever...not quite a month...since I updated the blog. Actually not too much has happened. I'm still working out at 24-hour about 3 to 4 days a week. I would actually lose weight if I changed my beer intake, but that's a whole 'nother subject in itself. I am still troubled about my job. I just am meant to do something else. I've thought a lot about what I'm going to do next year if offered the 'curriculum support' class. I think I will head to the alternative school, or if a elementary school opens...or if I have to a whole different district. But let's hope there's a different position for me at Center because I wanted to break my 2 year streak so bad. For those of you who aren't keeping record....the longest I've ever held a job is 2 years. I was really hoping to break that.

I don't think I"ve announced it, but I am a bridesmaid yet again. Actually, a maid of honor. This time for my friend, Natalie. It will be a fun wedding. The actual prep time is shorter as her wedding will be in May. We'll be going to look at dresses soon. While, yes, I am getting tired of always being the bridesmaid...I have recently realized that it will happen 2 more times and that I need to keep a positive perspective. I also think, I want to be up front...not in the regular people seating...it's been a while that I've been to a wedding where I actually sat in the pews and didn't stand up front. I wouldn't know what to wear...

So yes, beer and I have become very close friends again. I don't know what happens but about 2:30, I just feel like, oh...I need a beer. I'm not the only one though...so me and beer are never alone...we're always surrounded by friends and their beer. But crazy empty calories which is why I am not losing weight like I should be. So...beer and I might actually have to enjoy each other less. It would help the poket book as well.

Which by the way, I am actually starting to get control of my finances. It's very exciting...yet...kinda depressing at the same time. I could definately have a lot more money if I didn't spend it all on fast food and happy hour. (damn beer)

Anyway...I'm on a good journey. I'm still very happy and doing the things I want, just really enjoying life to it's fullest.

Cheers until next time!

Bout friggin' time eh?

I figured it was about time to update this. I doubt anyone reads it anymore, but maybe it'll make me feel better after I see what I've done in the last month and a half (if I can remember).

The big things: I joined 24 hour fitness again, school started back and I had to start working again, my lil' bro turned 27, and yeah, I had to start working again...

So in August about 2 weeks before I started back to work, I joined 24-hour. My friends and I thought it was fun to go up and play in the pool. One day I took in a water aerobics class....and it was like drugs. I've been hooked ever since. I go 2 x a week because that is all they offer it. If they offered it everyday, I'd be there...even if my skin came off in big ugly sheets because of the saltwater chlorine. I LOVE IT! These days I'll turn down just about everything so I can keep my standing appointment. So anyway, I"m working out again...I'm ready to go everyday, but I haven't quite gotten there with the schedule yet.
School started back up on the 11 of August, a whole month ago. It was good to see the kids again. I am not teaching self-contained this year....my 'new' job is called curriculum support, plus I teach a science/social studies resource class and an enrichment class. I'm not really enjoying it. I'm sure I'll make it better, but I think I'll try and push for something more my deal like teaching curriculum or just dealing with behaviors. So yeah...I"m teaching that stuff I said earlier and dealling with all the kids with ED/BD (emotional disorder/behavior disorder). So somedays it's kinda like I'm double timing it. That's fine with me though. I like, crave, enjoy, want, need the chaos. The thing that is getting me this year is that I have already had to advocate for kids--to my coworkers/administrators....these are educators that I have to put my foot down to and verbally explain to them why a kid should be where they are. The home ec teacher can't stand one of my kiddos with BD...she can't deal...but that doesn't mean he shouldn't get home ec. Everyone should make a pillow...he deserves to as well. I had to get red in the face (mainly because I couldn't believe this bs)and really give my supervisor a talking to...cuz I wasn't talking with her....to her! Man, I just can't believe some people and their need to please. As an educator, I'm pretty hard core...I mean, I really believe in the least restricted environment and I fight to keep my kids there. Yo, if there's any reg. ed teachers out there...let me just tell you that your job isn't just about the goody goodies....you gotta modify now and accomodate...for ALL students. I mean wake up--especially if you teach in the city--most of these kids can't read any better than the ones that are labeled in my realm.

Most of the time I just wish everyone were are smart as me. Or at least had some common sense to work with.

My lil' bro turned 27, meaning I'll be the big 30 this year. Everyone mark their calendars--March 21 will be a big day as will the weekend after.

And in other news, the dating scene in KC sucks terribly....I don't know why he hasn't come my way yet, but I'm ready for him. I'm feeling good about myself and happy with life...I mean bring it on.

That's all for now, sorry for the educational rant....loves and hugs!

Chicago

Well....I got back on Thursday from Chi-town. It was an interesting experience. I thoroughly enjoyed my time and got to see so much. Basically, everywhere I wanted to go plus some, I went. My favorite: The Field Museum. The King Tut exhibit was there and it was fantastic.
I really learned more about public transportation than I ever feel I needed to know. I am very handy with a map. While, I enjoyed my time...I don't think Chicago is one of my favorite cities.

I still have electricity--this was a concern after my last trip.

Today was my father's birthday and tomorrow is the year anniversary of his stroke. It's really changed my family's lives, I'll be happy when tomorrow is over and we can officially say we made it through a year without another trip to the hospital.

Hope everyone is keeping cool--it's insanely HOT!

so many stories, so little time

Here's the last two weeks in a nutshell...

On July 13, I ventured to San Francisco, CA. I had a lovely time with an old friend and a new friend. Went to Santa Cruz to the boardwalk and laid on the beach, listened to the ocean. It was relaxing and humbling. We went into the city twice, one time while we were there I rode the trolley. It was scary and fun. I really had an enjoyable time.

I'm always ready to come home and so on the 17th, early morning, I flew back. I had a lovely evening with a friend and my dog. However, I woke up to no electricity. There was a KCPL truck out front so I figured they were fixing whatever was broken. But then after a few minutes the truck left. Still no electricity. I went out the door and found a aform note from KCPL saying that the electricity had been shut off because the house was considered vacant. So after calling and getting everything sorted out, I wouldn't have electricity for at least 24 hours. So, I bought a cooler (had to save the beer), packed some stuff up and left for Iowa (they were the first to answer my phone call). I figured if I pretended to be on vacation it would be more fun. So I went to Iowa and golfed for the first time. I loved it! It was such a good time. By the time I got home the next day I still didn't have electricity, nor did I until 9:30 PM, so I was without electricity for a good 36 hours. As you can imagine, there was a mess in the fridge and it took a while to cool down my house.

Were coming up to the 21st, when I decided to go to Witchita and see a friend. She actually lives in Derby, KS so that is really where I went. We played cards and had a good relaxing time. Her and her husband just bought a new home and it's beautiful!


Now I am preparing to go to Chicago. I leave tomorrow at 6:20AM :D It's the last trip before school starts again!

MUST LOVE DOGS

Well, it's a sad but very happy night. Tomorrow morning I leave for San Francisco, but tonight Maggie is at the vet being boarded. Very sad. I did not want to leave her. I felt incredibly guilty, especially knowing that I"m going to have a very good time and she'll be in a kennel(which she hates). I did cry a little and I miss her terribly. No one was here tonight to tear into the door when I got home.

Well, I have to finish getting ready for the trip! Everyone have an excellent weekend and hopefully I'll have some photos for you on Monday!

My dating diary

I haven't decided yet as to whether I will actually publish online or as a book, My Dating Diary. But I've taken some serious advice from a friend and started writing down my dates, what was good; what wasn't. It is probably the only thing that is keeping me from throwing my hands up in the air at the whole thing. Because believe you, me....dating is ridiculous! Just send a fantastic man my way...god knows I can't find him. I'm tired of working at this for just a lot of crap.

So be looking for my book in a few years. I'll let you know when my publishing party will be and you can all come!

Count down:
13 more days till payday
12 days till Chicago
1 day till San Francisco

San Francisco Bound

I go to San Francisco on Thursday. This is very exciting. I am however, having feelings of guilt for having to leave my dog in a kennel. Everyone that could watch her is also going on vacation this week. So, hopefully she won't hate me for making her stay in a kennel.

Anyway, I am very excited and if anyone has any places I absolutely have to go, please let me know. I'll be going to Chicago on the 24th, feel free to send or post those places I need to go as well.

Spider update: No spiders seen, I have been looking for them though. They could have found a really nice hiding space. This would be called the downstairs.

I still haven't warmed up to the house. I like the area, I like my neighbors, but the house....not so much. It's okay, just don't love it.

TGIF

Boy--I am in Friday mode. Even though everyday could be Friday for me....it truly is friday and I am truly in the mode. It's a good day.

17 days till payday--yes I'm counting. I hate getting paid 1 a month. It really sucks.

Anyway..I'm off to San Fran next Thursday! I'm pretty excited about it, but I can't figure out what to do with Maggie, everyone else that I would trust with her is going on vacation as well. It's about $25 a night to board her. ugh. decisions.

Anyway...I hope everyone has something fun planned for this evening. I am off to first fridays to drink free wine and browse some art. Cheers!

Happy 4th of July

So what is 4th of July really about...Independence Day? Supposedly it is about the severance of the allegience between the first american colonies and Great Britain (1776). The Declaration of Independence was 'adopted' on July 4th by the Continental Congress....but was it? Historians say that the thing wasn't officially signed by everyone until 1781. And we didn't really celebrate it until 1783 after the Boston Massacre happened.
History is a necessary evil, but I wish they would have taught us the truth rather than just overview what they want us to know and make us take tests on dates. Teaching History is a little different these days, there's a lot more concept teaching so the kids get the concept, like WHY Thomas Jefferson and committee wrote the Declaration of Independence. Not that it just happened and we have to accept it and memorize July 4, 1776.

And that my friends, is the history lesson for today.


I hope everyone gets out there and is able to pop of some fireworks. It's awefully rainy here, but that means that the grass won't set on fire....so fire away!

hard to get

I believe that boys are so much more fun if they are 'hard to get'. Do I just enjoy the chase? Maybe, or is it that I just enjoy the challenge. Like eating crab...it's challenging to get the meat out, you have to concentrate and in the end, you feel very satisfied (i do). Thus, I've decided, I'm out to find the challenge.

School's out for the summer!

No more pencils
No more books
No more teachers dirty looks

YEs! My summer officially begins right this moment and will end August 11. Ahhhhhhhhh!

It's a good feeling when...

the beer fridge is FULL!

what has 8 legs and makes me scream??

Spiders....frikin spiders comin' out of my pillow! I screamed so loud that I figured the neighbors would come over. But they didn't-go figure.

So I stayed up most of the night, every little thing seemed like a spider to me. And if ya know me, you know that I HATE spiders. I can't kill them because I am so very scared of them. So today I declared war. I sprayed the inside of my house with SEVIN. And then spread granules around the house. While I was spreading the granules, a big fat spider (bigger than a half dollar, no kidding) crawled up the side of the house. I hope they all die. They need to die if I am going to ever sleep again. I wouldn't even care if I had to go around the house and sweep up the spider carcuses.

So we'll see what happens. Thanks to b for answering the phone at 11:30 at night and listening to me cry about this house and all my frustrations with it.

On a more positive/happier note, tomorrow is the last day of summer school. No working until August 14, I believe. Thank god I"m a teacher....I get that one month off during the summer. It's so worth it.

well....have a good Thursday evening.

Super-fn-movie

Superman Returns is the absolute best movie I have seen in a year or so. Honest to God, I haven't seen a movie that good in a while. Of course, everyone needs to go see it and decide for themselves.

Ignorance vs. Laziness

Let me ask you this, as a special education teacher, is it my job to accept laziness as ignorance? Is it my job to allow my students to continue to blame their laziness on their stupidity? And where did they get the idea that they were stupid? Who allowed them to believe that they were stupid and 'couldn't do it'?

I cannot tolerate laziness in my classroom. Nor can I tolerate the fact that my students have been molded to believe they couldn't do it, that they weren't capable.

To all those who have procreated:
Please fight against the tolerance of laziness, teach your child to excercise, teach your child that they have to do the work, teach your child that they can do the work. Don't become lazy yourselves, you won't do the job you 'signed up' to do as a parent. Thus failure, and none of my friends/family are failures, I don't tolerate it.

*please note I laughed out loud after I wrote the final sentence above*

Anyway....Let me tell you what I have completed today: I worked and fought against the ever growing laziness epidemic, I went to Lowes, I bought an airconditioner and a pantry, I installed an airconditioner, I put together my new pantry.
It's been an amazing day. My new airconditioner is going to be worth its weight in gold.

getting settled

First things first - meet Maggie...the absolute cutest dog in the world. She is also the best dog in the world. She is my dog.

Now back to the blog---
Who settles? People moving in, people moving on, and people who are comfortable.

Well..I'm settling into my new house. It's got it's moments of pure satisfaction and pure boredom. I'm finding that I'm doing things I would never have done before like yard work and fixing things and figuring out my money situation. Creating a budget, knowing exactly how much money I have. I have turned into a total new person....or just pretending to be an adult. I can assure it's just the latter.

The exciting part of my life: I'll be going to San Francisco and Chicago in July!!! Two of the best cities in the US. I'm very happy for a vacation. Plus, it backs up the reason for me getting a masters. I want to travel in the summer and by god, I will.

Anyhow, I'm going to do better at writing on here so start looking again....I don't have much exciting to say, but I'll try to put in some uplifting stuff and more cute pics of Mag!

In other news....

Yesterday, I let you all know that I'm moving. I'm looking forward to this. I think it's like a new chapter in my life :D

I'm teaching summer school at Center Middle, where I currently teach. I'll be teaching the lower functioning group. It should be a nice change and fun. I'll be teaching there again next year. Although we won't have a Behavior Disorder room (which is what I teach now). I'll be teaching Curriculum Support (not sure what this is) but the exciting part is that I will get to interact with all of our students involved in Special Education! Plus, I think they voted for our pay to go up and so I'm going to forgo any afterschool activities and just work from 7-3. Can you imagine??? I don't know what I'm going to do with my time. I'll have to have a hobby or take a fun class like yoga or something.

Anyway...not much else is going on. I plan on visiting a friend in San Francisco this summer, as well as travelling to Chicago with another. I am going to try and get down one weekend to Springfield, MO and visit a friend that had a baby recently. Sounds fun!

Anyway...give me a call or email!

Change

I'm moving! Our landlord has decided to sell the house and so we have to move. I will be moving closer to work and without a room mate. I intend on having some pets again and enjoying myself in my new place. I am currently looking for a house to rent, hopefully I find one that I can afford. I will be moving on the weekend of June 10th.

Just wanted to give a quick update. Not much else is new....I think 11 days till school is over! I'm soooo ready.

Happy Birthday to ME!

Another year older, but not 30 yet! Each year seems to get better and better, this year is already started out fantastic! I received a pretty bobble from Tiffany's, yes, I, Bonnie Steen, got a little blue box! And I did it without a boyfriend! My friends are the very very BEST! I can sure pick em'. It's only 9:30 AM and already today has been the most special!

Well...where's my invitation to Bonnie's bash? Bonnie isn't having one. That's right, no big party this year. I am going to try my luck at winning a load of money after I've eaten all you can eat crab legs tonight.

Here's some facts for you about me, I was:

24 years old at the time of the 9-11 attack on America
22 years old on the first day of Y2K
20 years old when Princess Diana was killed in a car crash
18 years old at the time of Oklahoma City bombing
17 years old when O. J. Simpson was charged with murder
15 years old at the time of the 93 bombing of the World Trade Center
13 years old when Operation Desert Storm began
12 years old during the fall of the Berlin Wall
8 years old when the space shuttle Challenger exploded
6 years old when Apple introduced the Macintosh
6 years old during Sally Ride's travel in space
4 years old when Pres. Reagan was shot by John Hinckley, Jr.
2 years old at the time the Iran hostage crisis began

HAPPY 29th to ME! Cheers to all my friends and family. I love you!

And The Oscar...

better not go to Brokeback Mountian. That is all I have to say for now.

weather

The weather is such a tease. It's been in the 80's for two days and now it's going to be chilly-willy. My disapointment is great. I'm ready for spring and sandals.

POWER BALL!!

I didn't win the power ball....but boy, do I wish I did. Although, it'd be too much money. If any of you ever win, all I want is to be out of debt, and it's not really all that much...maybe like 60 thou...(not that much, ha).
Anyway, things are getting easier with the money, I"m finally getting a bit smarter at it. I know where I spend my money now, and I know what I need to change. Money is such a weird thing. I guess I don't really think of it in dollars and cents, I just think of what I want, and what I need, and what bills do I need to pay.
I thought it was funny that Oprah has totally copied off of me and started this finance thing on her show. I probably deserve some royalties for the idea...
In other news, I've been sick with some kind of creeping crud (that's what the dr. called it), but I'm getting better. I have to work on President's Day, but no kiddos. I have noticed that life is no longer an emotional roller coaster. I don't get too excited or too depressed about anything. And for the time being, I think that is mighty fine. Once the sun comes out and it's time for sandals, I might switch that up again.
Cheers and have a good week!

I'm all for global warming...

Just wanted to share a realization I made today...I'm an adult.

Thanks to my cousin and mom for the Valentine's. They really made me feel special, especially this Valentine's Day.

12 more days left in February, 32 more days until my birthday. Good Lord, where has this year gone already.

hugs & kisses (and thoughts of either a snow day or warmer weather)

Vday

The Valentine Poem ala Team 215 (my class)

Roses Are Red
Violets are Blue
Gimme a dollar,
OR I'LL SLAP YOU!

An add that sums up how I feel about this valentine's:

For Sale Cheap!!

one tiny bow and arrow w/quiver

said to inspire feelings of love and devotion.

See if YOU can make it work.

Owner seeking more rewarding employment

with long term benefits.

Call Cupid at 1-800-NO-LOVE

Valentine's Day - Who needs it!?!

Vday

The Valentine Poem ala Team 215 (my class)

Roses Are Red
Violets are Blue
Gimme a dollar,
OR I'LL SLAP YOU!

An add that sums up how I feel about this valentine's:

For Sale Cheap!!

one tiny bow and arrow w/quiver

said to inspire feelings of love and devotion.

See if YOU can make it work.

Owner seeking more rewarding employment

with long term benefits.

Call Cupid at 1-800-NO-LOVE

Valentine's Day - Who needs it!?!

Moving on....

So, I'm moving on....on to what, I'm not sure. I know that I'm looking at houses to buy this summer. I'm pretty geeked about that. I can't wait to have pets. I can't wait. I don't know that I can afford myself....but it'll be nice to own my own place.

So, I can't afford myself. I do not know how one goes out to look for a future husband, or just to hang out with friends, or to relax from the very stressful week and does not go BROKE! How are we (meaning, single girls) supposed to afford these things? Men don't take you out anymore...there isn't any dating.....and if there is, it's dutch. I'm just not getting it. It's a lose lose situation. I can stay at home and save money, but I won't be meeting anyone. I can go out and spend lots of money, but then I won't have any money. LOSE LOSE!! I'm telling ya....the dating world sucks. Why can't my friends just hook me up? Or why can't he just appear outta no where, just right there for me? Silly questions.

Well...cheers to me not becoming a spinster, however if I ever do--please love me anyway.

It's been a minute

Well...it looks as if it's been a while since I sat down to my computer. I really don't do it that much since there is a marathon of CSI's on at any moment that I am home. I have totally become a CSI/NCIS/Law&Order/Numbers/all other shows that fall into this catagory junkee!! I love them all and can watch them for hours. I'm not exaggerating, I have actually done this. My favorite is CSI-Las Vegas. Something about that Grissom.
Anyway....I've been doing a lot of things for myself so far this year. I'm getting my finances in order. In fact I talk to a financial planner tomorrow. Hopefully they will give me ideas on budgets and how to save money. I've also been doing more activity. I take yoga classes on Wednesday. I also do pilates at home as well as walk a mile in the morning. It's been a good stress reliever. I haven't had stress as much as I have had more bouts of depression. It happens whenever life changes.
I'm growing up (finally) and life is changing for the better.
Work is fantastic. I can't believe I have a quarter and a 1/2 left. Then summer. This school year has really flown by. January even...everything is just going fast.
Anyway...thanks for everything. Even if I don't talk with you on a daily/weekly/monthly basis, I think of you. much love!

New Year's reSolution

Have you ever noticed that the word resolution is actually, re-solution. No wonder people make the same resolutions every year. I've been thinking of mine, and I just don't know if I have one. There are a lot of things I will accomplish, but not a resolution. As I accomplish my 'things', I'll let you know. I don't want to jump the gun and then change my things. Okay--I just noticed that I was speaking in Bonnie language and not everyone can understand that, so on to a new subject.

I have to go back to work tomorrow. I am not too excited. I really enjoy the laid back life of doing what ever, whenever. I'm sure it'd get boring after a while. It does seem though, that this year I enjoyed it more than in the past.

I did not get a dog. I know I wanted one, but my two go-to guys said no. For two different reasons, but both had a good explaination. I still believe that I'm ready for that next step. So, if not a dog, then it'll be something else. We'll just have to see what that will be.

Happy 2006. I hope it is one of the best yet! It started off very well.

how much sleep does one actually need...?

You guessed it...I've pretty much spent a majority of my break sleeping. Not a terribly bad thing...probably not a good thing either.

Anybody excited about the New Year? I'm not too terribly excited. Anybody have great plans to celebrate?

btw....I didn't get a dog. I really wanted one, but I didn't get one. My house will stay pet free for a little longer.

Happy New Year! Cheers to 2006.

Happy Holidays!

Well, it's been a month since I last posted. Sorry to my friends and family. I've been busy with work. As the holidays come closer, the kids get crazier. Plus with shopping and napping and all, I just haven't had time after getting home at 6pm.

I had the best Thanksgiving ever. I saw Maure and Brad, they stayed at my house. Jackie came up on her way home and so I got to see her as well. We stayed up and had girl chats (except for Brad of course). It was just such a good time. I am so blessed to have such wonderful friends in my life.

My students really were great for a while. Then, they just got a little crazy. Disrespecting, talking back, throwing tantrums--sounds like a 3-5 year old to me, too bad these are 8th graders.
So anyway, my strategy is to have 'boot camp' when we return to school. I will from now on be known as Drill Sargent Steen. :D I cannot wait.

Other than that, while I went through a rough patch, I'm still seeing the boy. There's just no one like him. The good thing is that recently we've had the healthiest relationship we've ever had. I still don't think it'll really turn into happily ever after. But for right now, until someone else turns my head....I'm living happy for this moment.

I want to wish everyone a Merry Christmas. I miss everyone and I hope your holidays are fantastic.

If you would like to tailgate for the Chiefs game on the 1st of Jan. Give me a call.

Break me off a piece

I love breaks from work. Thanksgiving break is much needed, and although all I've done is clean my house, I am feeling very relaxed and happy. Glad it's Wednesday and I am not at work.

I'm looking forward to Thanksgiving and having my family here. My brother is going to cook and I am going to help. That is very nice. I hope to play some board games and such while the fam is here. I think it'll be fun for everyone.

My cousin, Maure and her husband Brad I believe are going to drop through--that will be fantastic. My friend Jackie is also going to drop in on her way up north. Very exciting to see friends and be able to play host. I'm really looking forward to it. So much, that I'm cleaning my house from top to bottom. Which reminds me, I need to get back to that.

Happy Wednesday!

Reflective Happiness

Reflective Happiness is a new and researched way to help depression. It's all online. You join this club for so much a month and you have people who are there for you online, like an online buddy. You also participate in some activities online that are supposed to help you see everything more positively. Bunch of hooey to me. How can being in an online group help with depression. Write a book, sell it to hospitals and therapists...people need help in person, they just can't turn to a computer everytime they feel depressed. If they do, one day they wake up in their mid-40's and realize that they have no one, except all their imaginary friends on the computer. I was outraged when I read this study. As you can imagine.
I'm still struggling with the boy and the breakup. Everything seems very final these days. Life is still going on. I'm having great times with great friends, doing lots of fun things. I'm being adventurous and busy. BUT....but but but but but but but....even as busy as I can make myself be, or as unavailable as I can make myself be, my thoughts still turn to what ifs and why's and why me's. It's hard to not allow yourself to sink into the depth of angst that lies in those places. It's even harder to pull yourself out.
NO worries, folks. I'm doing all right, staying more than afloat, loving every minute, and probably happier than I've been for a while.

Thanksgiving??!! I've got friends coming to visit, Maure and Brad are coming here, my brother will be here, my parents will be around. I'm really looking forward to this holiday. It's going to be a very good visit. Even if my kitchen table is very small. We might have it buffet style this year. Good times!

Happy turkey day to everyone. Call me! It's the holidays, we should hear from one another. much love, bon

The word on the street is....

There is nothing wrong with me. My blood tests came back fine. Supposedly I'm in great health. yippie. Well, then, I need someone to explain why I am soooo tired/exhausted all the time. Am I just making up for the last few years? Do I need to sleep less? Am I really depressed and we just don't know it?

Anyway...I hope all is well with everyone. Give me a call, let me know how you're doing. hugs. bonnie

It's been so long....

Well...it's been a while, let me see if I can catch ya'll up real quick:
-health: been real exhausted lately, more than normal...so went to the dr. and had some blood taken, haven't got the test results yet. Could possibly be thyroid or anemia...or depression...?
-work: sucks most days, I'm not having a good time, I lost my want to go in and entertain my kids and make them want to learn. They are whiny babies and it gets on my nerves
-family:doing great! My dad is going great guns with his recovery, although it's still a slow process, he is really working hard. I still believe my brother is going to be the best lawyer ever. My mom, well...we all know, she is the strongest woman in the world.
-friends: hmm...well....let's see....I need to talk to you guys more, I miss you and I need you..please call
-THE boy: ugh. ssdd
-Match.com: going great, might meet a boy from there that seems to be a good one....but you never know.

I can't think of anything else too exciting. And of course if you want details, you'll have to call me or email.

insert Bethoven's 5th here

It's over. finally.

Friends---what do I have to do to find a decent man? Really....I don't think I have the problems. I don't do anything weird in relationships. And you know I've asked around to make sure. There has got to be a man out there that isn't cocky or shifty. I however can't find him. If you find him, please send him my way....I'm not joking. Many of you met your husband through friends--how do you expect me to meet a husband without you hooking me up? I've exhausted the bar--we are all for certain on this one. I will not date a man that I work with--we know that this just leads to crap. So start helping me out. Give me some ideas on what to do, where to go.... I'm tired of everyone meeting and finding someone and then getting married. It ought to be about my turn.

What a pity part I can throw. I'm just so dang angry that I was stupid enough to answer the phone last night. STUPID!!!!! I've got to get away from that boy.

blah.

TGIF

Thank God for days off!!

The Eeyore Conspiricy

There is a dark cloud hanging over me today. Sometimes it rains, sometimes it pours and sometimes it's just dark. Like Eeyore on Winnie the Pooh, except I'm not complaining about it. I'm just going to take it for what it is. Realism...remember, I'm trying to change my fatalistic ways.

How do you deal with follow through? What happens in your life when someone doesn't follow through? What happens when they don't follow through countless number of times? They aren't trustable. They probably aren't your good friend, if a friend at all. I need some thoughts on this, so send them my way. I know we've all been there. What do you do about it?

Always a bridesmaid

One of my very good friends, Mary, was married in a beautiful outdoor ceremony on Saturday. The weather was perfect. Everything went really well. As maid of honor, I took care of all the things that needed to be taken care of, as well as the mother of the bride. The wedding was really wonderful and so so beautiful.

I've been busy with that for about 2-3 weeks now. I don't know what I'll get to fill my evenings now. I have plenty of things I'd like to do. One of them being making a quilt out of old t-shirts. If anyone has any advice for me on this, please let me know. I've never sewed much more than a pillow (in class) and so I think this will be a real challenge. But if I can get it done, it will be the most rewarding challenge.

I'm still enjoying my job. Although the afterschool program I do (which I love) I might be stepping down from. They want me to stay until 6:30. That is a long dang day. Plus, now that I'm more motivated, maybe I wouldn't come home and nap everyday if I got off work at 3 everyday. Anyway...that's coming down the line.

I'm working out and trying to lose weight. But it doesn't seem to be working. I don't do diets very well...so if anyone has any advice or magical cures, let me know.

I hope everyone is doing well. I've been laying around all day and need to go back to do more of that. :D

And the beat rolls on...

I can be so slow at figuring stuff out. Take life for instance....I always want to make everything such a big deal--and it's not. But I've got some stuff figured out for a while.
Weddings always make me a little crazy. I think it's because they are never my wedding. I'm always working hard on someone elses. It's always wonderful and I love being there for my friends. But geez...I get a little too crazy and think like I need to get married. And that is never a good thought. While I know there are good men out there somewhere and maybe someday I will find one, I don't have one right now...and right now is what matters.
I'm trying real hard to be a realist rather than a fatalist.
My good friend Mary gets married this weekend. It'll be a lovely wedding and yes, I'm the maid of honor. We had a fantastic shin-dig for her on Saturday. It was such a good time.

Nothing else on the hotplate. Everything is going pretty well.
Happy Birthday, Chrissy!!

To Whom It May Concern

If you call me in the middle of the night, I am most likely sleeping and will not answer my phone.

Dirt Face

Okay, so....I fall when I run on dirt. It's not pretty. We lost another kickball game tonight, however, we did score points. I actually made it to first base, but when I was running to second, I fell. It was another face in the dirt. I have to laugh that stuff off, but I've actually contemplated going out there and practicing running. Who needs to see me fall at every game? I'm a big ol' girl...no one wants to see that. How awkward.
Anyway, it was still a bundle of fun. I enjoyed the team we played tonight, they were a good time.

This week has been the longest ever. I've been thinking it's Friday since Wednesday. (yuck)

Forget the man comment, I'm off the wagon or on the wagon, which ever it is.

If you'd like to go running some bases with me before next Thursday, let me know.

I heart everyone!

and the pity party has begun

I ask why? a lot. I just want to know why. I want to understand the reasoning behind things. I yearn to comprehend the behaviors of others. I am looking for insight into why individuals make the decisions they do. Why is the behavior there? Why has it appeared? Where does it come from? What is the root of the behavior?

It is my want of understanding human behavior that drives me to do my job, to be a good friend, to ask questions, to be a good daughter, and to analyze ever tiny aspect of my life and the interactions I have with others.

Don't hate because I'm into that. Embrace it and give me honest answers when I ask questions, even if my emotions will take over. At least the behaviorist in me will be satisfied. Someone ought to be, right?!

By the way, there is a window by my computer. On the other side of the glass, but on the inside part of the screen is a spider. It's one of those scary shifty ones. It's all I can do to sit here and type. The only ONLY thing keeping me from freaking out is that there is glass between me and this shifty arachnid.

whew. I've got to go get ready, I'm going to win some money at the casino tonight. Mama needs a new pair of shoes....

The irony

The irony of my situation is that I've been happily employed now for two months. But when I get home, I'm tired and all I want to do is take a nap. I recently decided to take on Operation Second Chance. It's a program at the alternative school that is for students on a long OSS and are in need of earning some credit without having to go to regular class. So I teach them for 2 hours a day after school. I started this today.

Get ready for the irony: I have more energy today than most. I am not in need of a nap.

I guess I just needed to work longer. weird.

FYI: I've met a very nice man. I'll leave it at that

ttfn. b

Some Monday's just suck and other wonderful stuff

Yeah, so today is one Monday that sucked. My kids were in trouble before they even got to me. I'm so focused on academics that their behaviors are becoming intolerable. So, again, I must switch it all up tomorrow. It would be all different if they weren't so dang smart.

Anyway, enough about them, more about me. Ha ha ha. So...yet another girlfriend has fallen wayside because of a man. (yes, I'm shaking my head as I type this) My very very good friend, Shannon T. has found her a man. Yes, a man. And a very nice man. I am not jinxing anything, but folks, I think this is the one. Here is why I think so:
1. She stops calling her friends (me) as often because she's hanging out with her man.
2. She only talks about him, them or work in our conversations.
3. She sometimes avoids talking about them because...umm...yes, I'm still single (and you just can't talk about those things with single people)
4. She stops calling her friends (me) as often........tsk tsk tsk tsk

It's so funny, now that I'm old and see the patterns my friends eventually fall into. I don't blame Shannon at all, in fact I'm very happy for her and I'm sure that I'll be in the wedding. :D Which will be fun and an extremely joyous occasion.

I'm tired of being the last one left. Slowly but shirley they are all leaving me for a man. I'm just waiting for it to be my turn, to leave them for a man...but will I? I don't know....right now, I think I would never leave my friends for anyone or anything....but it just seems to keep happening, even to the best of girlfriends, like my Shannon. Maybe I'll fall into the pattern and they will be the ones telling me that he's the one, and we're gonna get married. OR--maybe I'll buy my own house, have lots of pets, especially cats, and just grow old with myself and my pets and my friends and their husbands.

Who knows what the future holds. I just hope it gives me what I'm supposed to get and that I'm happy with it.

Congrats to all you girlfriends out there who at some time or another have dissed a girlfriend for your man. I hope he turned out to be worth it and that your girlfriends are still around to share in your relationship. You've gotta have someone to talk about "that stuff" with anyhow.

Cheers.

Kickball is a real sport

I played my first game of kickball tonight. We lost by 13 points...but we had the best time. My kickball team is called Schoolhouse Rocks and it is made up of people from the Center School District. My first time up to kick the ball, I had a good kick, but fell on my face while I was running. I know NOONE can believe that...ha ha. It was hilarious. I tried to get them to give me 1st base. But the other team was hard core. I'm really glad I decided to do this. Come and see any of the games they are on Thursday nights at either 7 or 8 o'clock at Penn Valley Park. Our team is by far the most fun.

Other news....ummm...there isn't much. I'm enjoying my brand new car. My job is still good. My life is okay. I've recently realized that since I moved jobs and graduated, I've really narrowed down my good friends. Sometimes that's enjoyable, other times it's hard to realize some of the people you thought were great friends, well, just aren't.

I hope everyone is having a fantastic week. I'm really looking forward to this weekend in KC, there is a lot to do.

Been a while

It's been a while since I made the time to write on my blog. Everything has been going pretty well. I still enjoy my job, however the honeymoon with my students is over. Which means that I have to be pretty mean all the time just to keep the control in my classroom. It'll settle down in a bit though and we'll start having fun. I have some really great kiddos.

I crashed my car last weekend into a median and ended up totalling it. It was quite embarrassing, during rush hour and all. My car wouldn't move because I had busted the axle, so I had it towed to a Ford place and then I caught a ride to the bar--what else would I do? And no, I was on my way to the bar, not at the bar already!! (everyone asks that...) Really, just don't look down at your phone to see who is calling...it can be the death of your car. BTW, I now have a brand new 2006 Ford Focus family sedan. Bells and whistles galore.

I hope everyone has had a fantastic labor day weekend. Mine has been pretty good. Spent a lot of time with the family and good friends. I enjoy those times.

The first days of school

I love my kiddos....I love my job. I was home by 3:30pm today!! Everyone, pick yourself up off the floor...I know, it's a shocker. I'm actually teaching. It's just the best of times right now. I'll let you know when the honeymoon is over. Actually one of my boys decided the honeymoon was over yesterday. But none of it is anywhere near the stress or level of disrecpect I encountered at the place that shall not be named.

The worst part of my job (right now) is that I have to leave my house by 6:15AM. That is just entirely too early for me. I'm sure I'll get used to it, but sheez. I need to go to bed by 8:30PM....speaking of, it's past my bedtime already. And actually I'm not there because I took a nap today. Yes, I've become a perfectionist at the napping. My roommate couldn't even wake me up to go get a drink----what the hell??? It's the 5AM business.

This is a poorly written blog, sorry. I'm more in a chatty mood. We all know, when I"m chatty I don't always make sense to anyone else. So if you are at all confused. See a blog later this week or early next week. I promise it will be better written.

Buddy, Dora, and the boys.

School starts on Wednesday--can you believe it?? I'm happy to be back into a normal schedule. It's nice to not have school anymore. I really might enjoy not being a student this year.

I signed up for a kickball team. We will play on Thursdays. If you ever wanna come watch, let me know. Also, if you are interested in creating your own team look up www.kickball.com I will be on the Schoolhouse Rocks team, which is made up of mostly Center Middle School teachers.

So, the hamsters (Buddy, Dora, and the boys) are going to school tomorrow. They are very excited to meet new students. Two of them will probably be going to Gordon Parks Elementary. I am sure they will have a good time with the little ones there. I will be keeping Buddy of course and Dora (if she's not a chosen one) will probably stay across the hall in Ms. Sage's room. I'm planning on getting one of those really fun hamster homes for Buddy. She certainly deserves one. I'll have to take a pic and put it on here for ya'll to see. They are pretty cute little rascals. I suggest them for any classroom.

I hope everyone is having a fantastic start to their week. chow!

Shake it off

I'm still a failure at shaking it off. I just can't get over some things. Anyone have any secrets to 'getting over it' or moving on?

I haven't been up to much lately except for embracing my new job. I'm really enjoying the public school. It brings lots of new challenges. I am excited to meet my kiddos on Wednesday.

Happy Sunday to everyone. I hope it's relaxing.

Do you love where you work?

I love where I work. I really haven't been there long, and I reserve the right to change my mind later, but right now, I love where I work. I'm excited about teaching. I feel supported and appreciated (and they haven't even seen me teach yet...). It's just a fantastic feeling. I want everyone to have it.
The one of many things my dad has taught me is that I should love what I do. Since our primary life is our job, we should enjoy it. It really sucks the life out of you if you are doing something that you abhor for 9-?? hours a day. How are we supposed to enjoy the rest of the day (like 4 hours) if we spend 9-?? in misery? I know how I did it at my last job when I was always miserable. I was a member of DTA--drunk teachers association. Funny stuff.
Well....I wish for everyone to love where they work and what they do.

Daddy-o update: he's doing well. Today I was told that mom took him to the farm and he watered his shrubs!! This is fantastic. This is just a sign of normalcy. I think it was very much needed for our family. Thanks to everyone that has sent me information or where to find information, keep it coming.

Have happy days!

Northern Vacation

With all the excitment-good and bad, I decided to take a vacation this weekend. I drove up to Minnesota to see my 'cousin', Maure. While the drive was long and boring, it was so worth it. We had such a fantastic time.
When Maure moved to Kansas City and we started hanging out (we really didn't know each other before this time) and we became really tight. Well..since those good times, Maure has fallen in love, married and moved away. It's a very sad deal, since she played such a major role in my life. This weekend was the first weekend, I feel, that we have really connected since she got married. It was so nice and necessary to have that connection back. (sidenote-I'm starting to see this pattern with all my newly married friends) Anyway, my vacation was perfect. I hung out with Maure all weekend. We just had good times. And while our lives are very different, we can still understand, empathize and love each other. I truly do agree with Maure, we were meant to be sisters.

I'm seeking information on strokes, so if you know of any good sites, books, or organizations in KC...please let me know.

Life

Do you want the good news or the bad news?

The good news is that the bash on Saturday was fantastic. Loads of fun, I wish everyone I knew was there. My dad turned 59 and had a great time hanging out with his friends.
I also made the grades to graduate. I've promised my self a year off of school before I start again. Whether I'll actually start again is a whole nother deal. I had my day of filling out paper work for my new school - Center Middle School. I just love everyone there. I knew about half of the new employees either from UMKC, DTA, or NWMSU. It's going to be a good time. I hope to be there for a while. Hopefully longer than 2 years, which is the longest I've ever held a job.
Eric starts law school soon. I believe he's ready to go. He'll make a fantastic lawyer.

The bad news. My dad had a stroke on Sunday. He was able to come home Wednesday night. It's just so funny how life changes in just a second. We've got a lot of work to do. He is okay, just weak on the right side and has some speech problems....but we are pretty lucky that he recovered so well. If anyone reading this has high blood pressure, get your life changed. Eat better, take your medicine, walk or excercise. Do something for yourself, or you too will end up with a stroke.

Anyway...I start my new job for real next week and the kids come the week after. It'll be a good change of pace. Please pray for my family and my father.