why politics aren't for me.

My job isn't mechanical or monotonous.  It's not lists of to do's.  It's not 9-5, or even 7-3.  Every day is emotional.  Every day is different.  Every day is a challenge.  I have to 'shoot from my hip'.  I make split second decisions ever split second.  I wear my heart on my sleeve.  My job is all soul.  My job is all heart.  My job is all emotions. 

I just left an amazing Parade of Bands.  All the bands play.  The crappy sounding beginning 5th grade band.  The not-as-crappy sounding 6th grade band.  The awesome sounding 7th grade band.  Just as awesome 8th grade band.  And the 1-rated High School band.  The difference between the beginning 5th and 6th grade band and the rest - the directors.  My good friend, brother, fellow alumnus, and cycling coach, Carrie Shuck.  She is an amazing person and a just as amazing band director.  She expects excellence and growth, demands it.  The quality of band she produces, creates, is unlike that of any other small urban school district.  So why is she leaving?  Why did the school board edge her out?  Why was she pulled in and told her contract wouldn't be renewed - by the school board?  (Nothing to do with principles or fellow co-workers or even parents).  I don't think I will ever know why a certain board member had it out for her.  What's worse is that he has risen to presidential standings and been applauded.  It  makes me sick.  Maybe 'they' don't know what they are going to miss.  Maybe they don't know how hard it is to find a quality band director.  Wait, they don't know, because the band director they found - his band got a 4 rating a contest.  So bad it's almost unheard of. 
I walked out of Parade of Bands.  They announced the school board and applauded their excellence before they recognized Carrie and her extraordinary work.  They congratulated them on their new appointments before announcing that Carrie was leaving along with the 6th grade band director - whom they didn't explain that she was told in October that she would not have a job next year.  I guess they are getting rid of that position. 
I couldn't contain my anger as the superintendent walked in late and stood 2 people beside me.  I was slightly crying and then just couldn't contain it.  I couldn't get myself back together to say congratulations to all my students that are in band.  Or to my friends that conduct it.  I had to leave.  I walked five blocks home, crying, cursing every step about unfairness, inequality, quantity over quality, money decisions deciding the fate of the future education of our children.  This is why politics aren't for me.

 

something new

Here is a snake that I found wound up in some netting in my backyard (netting was to cover the pond and keep leaves/birds out).  I decided to free him and let him live.  Moments after I took this picture - Maizey (cat) started playing with him...but I believe he is still alive and not dead. 
BTW - if anyone has any great ideas on how I can get two rocks about 200 lbs each out of the pond, let me know.  If you are willing to help, that's even better.

Not a fantastic pic, but I love the sweater and necklace I'm wearing. This is before Natalie's baby shower on Sunday.  By far the best baby shower ever.  Short, sweet, good food, no games!!

My life is so exciting.  I'm so glad I can share it with you.  (that's sarcasm people).

why.

Lately I'm finding it incredibly hard to live within the moment and just enjoy the life I've created.  I hate wasting time on being unhappy.  I know it's a choice - I just haven't been able to make the choice.  Today was particularly rough, while I should have been enjoying my friend and all the great things going on for her, I felt as if I was being punished and beat down.  I really am so selfish and angry.  I'm not quite sure where to put the feelings, but I need to find someplace useful - working out, new hobby, cleaning, yard work....   I really hate wasting my time on these angry, sad, depressed feelings. 

I've misplaced my rain gear.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

Do you ever feel like screaming?  I cannot pin point my frustration because I believe it is occurs because of several different situations.  What I do know, is that when it rains, it pours.  

36 more days.

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.

--Reinhold Niebuhr

remembering gratefulness....

May today there be peace within. May you trust that you are exactly where 
you are meant to be. May you not forget the infinite possibilities that 
are born of faith in yourself and others. May you use the gifts that you have 
received, and pass on the love that has been given to you. May you be 
content with yourself just the way you are. Let this knowledge settle into 
your bones, and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise and 
love. It is there for each and every one of us.

JO xxxooo

JAMIE OLIVER

click my link, sign the petition, change the way you eat. 


I am impressed and amazed with Jamie's passion.  I love what he's doing.  I wish an American could have stood up against it all and done this.  What are we waiting for, death?

I made a goal for myself prior to the beginning of 2010 (I live into my goals, so sometimes they take time), that I would have a garden and be eating whole foods, and change my milk (no more plastic).  I changed my milk a while ago to Shatto, glass bottles, it's a farm near by Kansas City - so hometown grown, and they are all organic.  The whole point was to decrease the amount of chemicals I put in my body.  I realize that I'm late in the game, but it is never too late to change - or feel good about yourself.  I haven't cut out all processed food quite yet, but I'm well on my way.  Every trip to the grocery gets better and better and easier!
This all started for me prior to Jamie's food revolution.  This started when I red Jillian Michael's Metabolism book.  She spews the facts and does a crap-ton of research. I respect that.   So now between Jamie's passion and Jillian's research, I'm even more motivated to get this done for myself.

Thank you Jillian Michaels. Thank you Jamie Oliver.  Thank YOU for signing the petition and believing that we can still change our world and give our children a better one.  Believe me - our children are not getting the best of our world.  As a teacher in an urban area, I can tell you from my perspective we're giving them shit on a plastic plate (literally AND figuratively).  The only passion I have left for my job is knowing that I am doing my VERY SMALL part to change our youths future.  It takes a village.